It’s been a while since I last blogged, the main reason being that I broke my phone and am using one that is SO painfully slow. Then I forgot my password when I downloaded WordPress to the iPad then bla bla bla here I am…
So I thought I would get back into it by talking about something that has been on my mind a lot lately… and I know is something a lot of people find themselves wondering…. Who am I? I am most definitely having an identity crisis.
I started the year being really focused and determined, I had set my own goals for the year ahead and really felt positive for the first time in a long time….. Fast forward 5 weeks and I’m back in the dark place that I go into every now and then. I either go one way or the other, super upbeat and positive, or in a black hole of negativity.
In these moments, the ups and the downs, there’s always one common factor and that is who am I, I feel like I have lost myself. I’ve really withdrawn myself socially and I feel like I don’t know who I am. I’m mum to my two beautiful children and that gives me purpose, I have a good job that works well around them, and of course I have Kyle…
But there is still something missing … I look in the mirror each morning and I just see a person, a shell of myself, like I’m not there, I don’t know who I’m looking at.
Each day I’m trying to find a little bit of time to just focus on myself, think about what I want and who I want to be. I’m still trying to find that, and I’m sure it’s going to take some time.
So what is it that defines you? what would you want to see if you looked back on yourself in 10 years time? These are the things I’m asking myself and you should ask yourself too.
Are you living the life you want? Are you fulfilling your goals and dreams?
Find yourself, find your way and when you do, enjoy every day, as you really don’t know when it will be your last. This is what I’m going to do.
My next journey will be just that, finding myself again.
To any one else feeling this way… you will get there, just don’t give up on yourself, your worth so much more.